When Elisabeth, a 34-year-old lawyer, took the plunge and signed up for OkCupid in May 2014, her expectations were modest at best. Navigating the world of online dating can be a challenge for anyone.
But for women, especially those who don’t fit society’s narrow beauty standards, the journey can be particularly daunting. Yet, when a law school friend, fresh from a divorce and eager to dive back into the dating scene, rallied Elisabeth and a couple of other former bridesmaids to join her in solidarity, Elisabeth decided to embrace the opportunity with gusto. She resolved to create what she dubbed as «the single most obnoxious version» of herself for her profile. Despite years of trying online dating with carefully curated profiles, she hadn’t found much success.
So, she took a bold approach, opting to prominently feature photos of herself with her beloved cat and being upfront about her perceived flaws and sticking points. Most importantly, she refused to apologize for her body size. Elisabeth wears sizes between XL and 2XL in dresses and between size 16 and 20 in pants, and she made no effort to hide it.
Reflecting on her experience, Elisabeth shared, «When you’re a fat woman navigating the world of online dating, there’s a constant struggle with how to present yourself in photos. You’re aware that with the right angle, lighting, makeup, and clothing, you can appear thinner. But ultimately, when you meet someone in person, all those facades fade away.»
